Why You Keep Getting In Your Own Way (And What’s Actually Behind It)

There’s a moment most people recognize. You know what you need to do. You’ve known for a while. And yet you don’t do it. Most people call this self-sabotage. And they’re right. But what most people don’t know is why it happens. Or where it actually comes from. It’s not a willpower problem. It’s not a character flaw. It’s a pattern. And patterns, unlike character flaws, can change. In this post I’m breaking down what self-sabotage actually is, where it comes from, and the three targets most people don’t know about. Plus there’s a free webinar coming where we do this work together live.

“That’s Just Who I Am”. The Truth Nobody Tells You About Your Personality

“That’s just who I am” sounds like self-awareness. Most of the time, it’s the most convincing lie we tell ourselves. Your personality and your survival strategy aren’t the same thing. Every pattern you carry made sense once. It kept you safe, loved, and functional in a world that asked too much of you too young. But a strength overused becomes the way you self-sabotage. And you’re not in that room anymore.

ON LOVE, GROWTH & MENTAL FITNESS

Love is a powerful force that can transform lives. When we open ourselves up to receiving love, we allow it to heal and uplift us. But the path to self-love is not always easy. We must overcome our own doubts and fears, and learn to trust in our worth. By doing so, we can create a healthier and more fulfilling relationship with ourselves and others.

What I Know Now That I Wish I’d Known Then: The Coming Out Edition

Eight years ago I wrote about coming out. Today I’m writing about everything I wish I’d known then. The complexity of sexuality and attraction. The difference between sexual and romantic attraction. The word demisexual — and why finding it quietly changed things for me. And the mental patterns that kept me performing a life that didn’t fit long after I thought I’d figured myself out. This one’s personal. If you’re somewhere in your own process of becoming, I think it’ll land.

Full Circle: Why I Left Life Coaching, Went Back to University, and Came Back Knowing This Is Exactly Where I Belong

A journey through doubt, growth, and coming home to my calling — queer and trans life coaching. There's a question I've been sitting with lately — one that makes me smile now, even though it once would have made me wince. Did I really spend years at university, just to come back and become a …

“Hire a Life Coach? In This Economy?”

Life coaching might seem indulgent during tough economic times, but staying stuck costs more than you think. Smart, capable people drown in information, needing clarity, not more productivity hacks. When resources are limited, knowing your goals is crucial—stop wasting time and energy.

How Unconscious Bias Nearly Derailed My Transition—and What It Taught Me About True Self-Discovery

I had lived forty years as a woman, birthed five children. My entire identity was wrapped up in being a mom—not just the title, but everything that came with it. I was the nurturer. The emotional center of the home. The one who anticipated needs, who created safety, who held space for everyone’s feelings. When …

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